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~;~;~;~;~;~BLUESKIES~;~;~;~;~;~

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post-valentine's pearlfields

hmm...past 8 na di pa rin nag-aaral sa chem...kasi the truth is, i am really really sad simula pa kahapon...

I'm on my knees
only memories
are left for me to hold

Dont know how
but Ill get by
Slowly pull myself together

Theres no escape
So keep me safe
This feels so unreal

Nothing comes easily
Fill this empty space
Nothing is like it seems
Turn my grief to grace

I feel the cold
Loneliness unfold
Like from another world

Come what may
I wont fade away
But I know I might change

Nothing comes easily
Fill this empty space
Nothing is like it was
Turn my grief to grace

Nothing comes easily
Where do I begin?
Nothing can bring me peace
Ive lost everything
I just want to feel your embrace

--grace by kate havnevik

**current song na nagfi-fit sakin ngayon....

kasi andami na namang na-realize...andaming factors...ayoko na talaga...and i do hope na kaya ko nang totohanin...i'm sick of this...sabi ko na this would happen...pero why did i go there? it was such an eerie feeling, nakakaiyak pero ndi talaga ako makaiyak kasi parang ayoko na rin...coz duh...i won't say that all that happened was wala lang dahil hello, kung wala lang yun i wouldn't have made all that fuss...grabe lang talaga ako ma-obsess..tapos i feel na ndi talaga siya yung taong inimagine ko...eh galing lang naman sa mga quotes niya yung mabubuo kong tao di ba...di naman kami nag-uusap...dati oo pero sa tinagal ng nakilala ko siya, mga 1/4 lang nung time na yun yung talagang nag-uusap kami..one thing i realized about him though is that he's really nice at may decency siya na pagtiyagaan ako (hehe), siguro nakulitan din siya sakin at siguro naisip niya rin na ano ba to? ba't to may crush sakin? pero at least hindi naman niya sinabi kina jaric/adrian or whoever di ba? hindi rin niya ako tuluyang nilayuan...soobra rin naman ako eh...yuck..ininvite ko pa siya nun...nakakahiya...eh ni wala man lang siyang pinahiwatig na intensyon niyang whatever it was that came to my head...i mean i guess wala lang sa kanya yun eh ako naman si miss sobrang na-excite, todo respond naman ako nang di naman necessary...sige lang ng sige...jump into conclusions...matatawag mo bang ka-close mo yung isang tao pag nag-uusap lang kau through quotes sa text? parang timang talaga...pero yun nga, kind ba talga siya o wala lang siyang pakialam? hay ewan..why do i even bother? that's not what's even important now...what's impoortant ay makapasa ako ng chem at yun! makapasa ako ng chem at makakuha ako ng mataas sa major ko...yun na muna for now...

eew tlaga, mga groupmates ko inaasar ako, for no reason at all, sa prof kong 30++ years old na...eeewww!

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